It Came From My Eyeball

Way back in time on the internet, a certain blogger *cough*kdiddy*cough* posted an extreme close-up photograph of her diseased eyeball. I’m not gonna do that. You’re welcome.

Last night when I was reading Sym her bedtime chapter of Harry Potter (the chapter of Goblet of Fire where Voldemort gets his body back, perfect reading for bedtime), my left eye started watering incontrollably. Just watering and watering. It was making me crazy, and it kept it up all evening, until I went to bed. At three am I woke up and discovered it was gooped shut, and when I managed to pry it open my vision was all blurry and obstructed. I stumbled to the bathroom mirror and confirm my suspicions.

I am suffering from THE HEARTBREAK OF CONJUNCTIVITIS.

Gross. GROSS. Pink eye is the biggest drag ever, and it’s one of the diseases that the health authority mandates can’t be hanging out untreated in a child care setting. If the kids get it they can’t come (although I did once have a parent send her child to daycare with such a bad case of pink eye that it was like there were rivers of green snot pouring down his cheeks, yuck), and if I get it the kids can’t come. I had the text all my clients first thing this morning and ask them to keep their kids at home, at least until I go to the doctor. So inconvenient for them, but thankfully they were all very understanding (most people are when you tell them you have pus oozing out of your face).

The worst part is I know EXACTLY where, when and why I got this pinkeye. Not from any of the kids, and not from having a cold (did you know colds can spread up the inside of your face to your eyes and give you viral conjunctivitis? It’s true!), but from my own stupidity. See, I RARELY wear makeup. It’s just not suited to my life and tbh I don’t really care that much. So I rarely think about makeup, and I certainly never think about replacing old, old, old items. But on Wednesday night we went out for dinner with an old fried of mine, and I actually wore makeup for once. Without even thinking twice I swiped on a couple of coats of some Lancome Hypnose (aka the best mascara everrrrrrr) waterproof mascara. Waterproof mascara I bought to wear on my wedding day in case I cried. My wedding day which was in March of 2009.

Oops.

So. LESSON LEARNED. I will be tossing the offending mascara immediately and picking up a new tube- luckily the doctor’s office I’m going to is right next to a drugstore, which is convenient for both having prescriptions filled AND replacing bacteria-riddled mascara tubes (fun fact: in Canada you can buy Lancome mascara at the drugstore. One time on a trip to Seattle I forgot mine at home and I was SHOCKED and APPALLED that I had to go to Macy’s to buy a new one).

Beautiful Georgie

As promised, not a picture of my crusty, seeping eyeball.

7 Replies to “It Came From My Eyeball”

  1. hehe, I think I was in the midst of an unfortunate series of eye problems and could not BELIEVE the colors that my eye was turning. I needed people to commiserate with me.
    Sorry to hear about the goop and I hope your eye is better soon. Also, super jealous about the Lancome in drugstores. Yet another reason to move to Canada.

  2. I’ve never gotten pink eye from old make up (I didn’t even know that you could!), but when I had a cold and rubbed my eyes, the skin right underneath my eyes became super puffy and itchy. GROSS. The doctor said it was from me having a cold.

  3. I never had pinkeye as a child, but I’ve had it twice as an adult. It sucks hardcore. What really sucks is all the stupid joking from other people about who farted on your pillow or whatever. My doctor told me the same thing about it probably being from a cold virus. She said that 99% of cases are viral, and 1% bacterial.

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