Just a photobooth picture this week, I’m tired and in a terrible mood and I have one hundred billion things to do today to get ready for Sym’s birthday party, which is tomorrow. Please enjoy my new pajamas and my one stretchmark (I have four or five smaller ones on my left side, but the right side just has the one big one. WEIRD).
One thing I’ve noticed this pregnancy is that it kind of seems like people want you to feel crummy. Especially now here at the end when I’m super pregnant: people ask me how I’m doing with that faux-sympathetic head tilt and when I answer that I feel great it’s like they are almost disappointed? It’s weird and gross and I wish people would just stop doing it. Like what do that want me to say? That I feel so shitty I wish I never decided to have this baby? THAT’S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
HOWEVER. I’m going to be real here and say NO. NO I DON’T ACTUALLY FEEL GREAT. Of course I don’t; I’m 37 weeks pregnant for crap’s sake. I’m tired and my body aches and I have to go pee every time I stand up and all the bones of my pelvis feel like they are made of shards of broken glass. I’m also drained and exhausted emotionally and yesterday I burst into tears for no reason, several times. But when people ask me how I’m feeling I’m not going to tell them all that. I’m going to tell them I feel great, and I’m so happy to be having this baby. Because I am!
Other stuff I’m tired of:
• People commenting on my body (this seems weird to complain about with a picture of my belly at the top of this post, but I’m full of contradictions). Stop, just stop. Stop saying “OH WOW YOU ARE SO HUGE” because tbh I’m really not? I still haven’t even gained 20 pounds this pregnancy, so go find someone who’s gained like, 80 pounds and comment at them. No wait, don’t do that either. How about you just keep all your opinions and observations about women’s bodies to yourself because as unbelievable as this may sound, pregnant or not, our bodies aren’t public property.
• People speculating about the apparent freakish size of my baby. Again, JUST STOP. Why do people always do this? “WOW SURE LOOKS LIKE YOU’RE CARRYING AN ELEPHANT-SIZED INFANT WHO’S GOING TO TEAR YOUR VAGINA TO SHREDS!” followed by gleeful chortling. Why. Whyyyyyyyyyyyy. And even if I try to correct them and say “Well actually according to my sonograms and my doctor, the baby is on the small side of average” people still gotta say something about how the baby might come out really big. Um. How???? I only have a few weeks of pregnancy left, maybe you should spend less time trying to make me freak out and more time brushing up on your human biology, because an infant doesn’t double in size that fast.
• People I see every day saying “YOU’RE STILL PREGNANT???” What am I even supposed to say to this? “Actually I gave birth in the 16 hours since I last saw you, I just enjoy your inane comments so much I’ve decided to wear a fake pregnant belly all the time.” This pregnancy has actually felt like it’s gone by very quickly, but nothing makes time drag more than having the same boring conversation with the same person every day.
• When I’m out in public and there’s someone else with a baby and it starts crying and people say “Oh that’s what you’ll have to deal with soon!” (more gleeful chortling). OMG REALLY??? BABIES CRY????
Anyway. That’s all I have time to crab about today. Maybe I’ll be in a better mood the next time I post. MAYBE NOT.