Bad Reviews

Normally I try to only talk about nice things that I like, but I’m not feeling it today so here are some things I’ve tried recently that I didn’t like.

1. The Chocolate Chip Cookie Oreo Brownie Bars I made for my birthday.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Oreo Brownie Bar, with Ice Cream

That looks good right? Well in all honesty they were just okay. First of all, even though I baked them for less time than the recipe specified, they came out not quite burnt, but definitely overcooked and therefore really hard. Secondly, the recipe said to line the baking pan with wax paper. WHAT. This seemed insane to me, and I almost went with parchment paper instead but at the last minute decided to follow the directions since ironically, I didn’t want to mess them up. Once the bars were completely cooled they were okay, but we first tried them when they were still slightly warm and there was a total wax odor to them! GROSS. I think if I made these again they would be better since I’ve learned from my mistakes.

2. Moroccanoil Luminous Hairspray

Moroccan Oil Curls

I used this hairspray when I was curling my hair on New Year’s Eve and it works great as a hairspray, but it has an unfortunate fragrance. It’s a kind of weird, sickly-sweet baby powder and also antiseptic smell, and it’s the exact same smell as a Diaper Genie. Luckily I got this as a free sample and don’t feel like I wasted money on it, since I won’t be using it again. The last thing I want to be reminded of when styling my hair is anything to do with diapers!

3. Lancome Hypnose Doll Lashes Mascara

Mascara Flylashes

Lancome Hypnose is my FAVOURITE mascara, but the last time I needed a new tube I thought I’d try something new and I bought the Doll Lashes version. It was a huge mistake. Now, if you can get this mascara on properly it DOES give you really nice looking lashes, but the problem is that there is some kind of design disconnect between the formula and the wand. When you pull it out there is SO MUCH mascara glooped into the brush that if you don’t spend a million years carefully wiping it off you end up with the heartbreak of flylashes. It sucks because I did buy this so I DO feel like I wasted money, and I can’t justify spending another $28 on a tube of mascara when I have a sort-of perfectly good one already.

4. Real Steel

Real Steel

I know right? Like WHY would I even watch this movie? The answer is a certain husband (who has lost movie-picking privileges for a month) heard that the robot effects were really well done. And that’s true; the robots are very well done. The problem is with the people: every single human character in this movie is a terrible, unpleasant, nasty waste of oxygen. The dad is a horrible person, the kid is an insufferable brat, the semi-love interest, the aunt and uncle, the owners and promoters and spectators of robot boxing are all disgusting, awful people and watching the robots forced to destroy each other for the pleasure of these cretins was…. literally the worst movie watching experience I’ve had in a long time. I kept hoping the robots would become sentient and self-aware, then rise up and crush their human oppressors. I wanted Skynet to rain down nuclear destruction on them all! I read online that they’re already planning a sequel to Real Steel and in my mind the only way it would work would be if it was also a prequel to The Matrix.

Sentinel Matrix

Take that, Hugh Jackman!

6 Replies to “Bad Reviews”

  1. I’ve got the actual oil version of that Moroccan oil shit, and I LOVES IT. My hair is wavy/curly naturally, and when I use it, it gives me that tousled-but-not-frazzly look. I wonder if the smell is the same, though? I thought it was kind of a subtle fruity/floral scent, but I’ve never smelled a Diaper Genie (yet).

    1. I have the oil, as well as shampoo & conditioner, and they are all great! It’s just the hairspray that smells off-putting.

  2. Okay, I really, really, really hate the mascara picture.

    More than anything I’ve ever seen on the entire internet.


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